New Feature: Injury of the Week!

Thanks to modern technology, someone in the Brat Pack gets clobbered in an unexpected way just about every weekend. We think this is darned newsworthy. Sure there are injuries which persist far beyond a week and are way more serious than the rest, such as New Wave Dave's flattened thumb or Guido's almost-gig-related fracture. Those would be better named Injury of the Month, Injury of the Quarter, or Injury of the Indefinite Period Beginning July 4.

Guido went to the Bahamas, and all he got was this lousy broken toe.


For about six months out of the year, we take turns hosting and mutating at least one virus, but we'd have to dedicate a less regular post to Disgusting Plague of the Season because no one would have the energy to write it.Josh, a scientist but more importantly a gentleman, says it's polite to share.


I'm thinking more of the indescribable agonies we wake up with on Sunday and forget about by Thursday. Last week it was the sensation of a hammer smashing my shin.
Artist's rendering of someone else's shin hit with a hammer.


A few weeks ago, I fell off the stage just in time for shorts-weather.
The bruise "resolving," a fancy term used by nurses and investigators.


Jesse chuckles thinking about our hilarious version of Hurt So Good when the light tree toppled over onto Guido's head! When he was dressed as Mr. Miyagi! And Kendell, running to the rescue, tripped and fell!Thank goodness for the helpful ladies of the front row.


And who could forget Tommy getting punched in the face FOUR TIMES by his own microphone at Marly's? Or the time I walked into a bolt and stood in the street with blood spurting from my head?

If I got this for Tom for his birthday, would he let me borrow it?


You get the idea. Having missed the deadline for proper tribute to all of the above, we'd better announce this week's Injury of the Week, and quick. May I present the unique, inexplicable, and unprecedented ankle twist!

Artist's rendering of someone else's ankle all messed up.