Thursday, March 16, 2006

How We Got Ready for St. Patrick's Day

In preparation for the huge green binge of the next two days, New Wave Dave did a lot of research on how the saint who led away Ireland's snakes came to be honored by so much beer and whiskey. Did he also drive out the monkeys and the elephants and the kangaroos, leaving nothing but potatoes and leprechauns and little pots of gold? Whatever, thanks a lot Pat! After cleaning up the sulfur explosion in his top secret basement laboratory, Josh of Seagulls synchronized a fleet of laptops for our massive instant message party at Tommy G's (now a hotspot). We've had the Jessbot on a charger since Sunday, following reports that his persistently low battery was upsetting female fans. TOMMY TUBULAR has been making out with the Blarney Stone in order to preserve his reputation as the most persuasive debater on earth. Menudo's on a secret mission, to be revealed next weekend at the Copper Dragon. And I spent the whole week at the Old School Dance Party Hip Hop Boot Camp, only to be suspended for letting a guest star show up with her hair a mess - no fair! - but at least I'll get to hang out with Guido. If he calls.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

guido told me to tell you his number is 8675309 and he lives on electric avenue and you owe him fifty bucks.

The Devas said...

I would appreciate less whining from you, Lauper. Our fictional characters are sure to show up perfectly groomed, to remember ALL of their lines, not just the ones they think are funny, and to refrain from offending TOMMY TUBULAR. We may end up liking them better!

Anonymous said...

oh yeah and guido said you can call him anytime on that number

The Devas said...

In addition, fictional characters have excellent pitch and don't make fun of sound engineers. They are not likely to request a bonus at the end of the evening, being scheduled to return to their unenchanted states (mice, pumpkins, etc.) just after the gear is loaded out. Perhaps more critically, they don't NEED to attend Old School Dance Party Hip Hop Boot Camp in order to master simple moves that everyone else in the band can already do.

Tell Them It Was a Friend said...

Does anyone know if TOMMY prefers a particular Larry move?

The Devas said...

Hey Guido!
I tried that number, and there was no answer. Also, I can't find Electric Avenue, so I wonder if I'm spelling it wrong. Or maybe I misunderstood Anonymous' message about how to get ahold of you. Guido? Are you there? Please hang out with me. I'm sorry about all that stuff I said. And about the money too. Do you have a new phone number?

The Devas said...

So you're avoiding me too?

Jesse VanHalen said...

I was looking over this blog and I have to admit that there's a lot of stuff on there that I just don't remember. I do remember Tommy making out with Yoda and I also remember St. Patrick wearing a pimps hat. What up with that. I'm just looking forward to being blue and blew.

JV